We need to talk. This relationship thing we have going on, it’s not really working for me. I want to break up.
It’s not me, it’s you.
You’re a control freak, you completely took over my life, you took from me the first year of being a Mum. You affected me like nothing ever has – that’s not a compliment by the way. You were always there niggling away at me; I need space.
You came into my life just after my little boy had been born, you made me scared to be a Mum and doubt my ability to do a good job. Because of you I blamed myself, you made me think I was failing. I couldn’t even leave the house without you tagging along. Even when I was out with my friends you were there, telling me to go home, holding me back.
Well stick this in your pipe and smoke it – you don’t get to do that anymore. I’m taking back the control.
You’ll always be there, I know that. Like a ghost, a memory of what used to be but I refuse to have you pulling my strings anymore. Everytime I can’t walk out of that door and the memory of your mind games rears its ugly head I’m going to imagine looking at you dead in the face and tell you I can. I will show you I can, I will show you how I can. I’ll let you be there in the background if it means that much to you but anything you say will just wash over me.
I’m strong now, I can fight you. I might have bad days with your words appearing in my mind but the next day you will be gone. I promise you that.
Anxiety, you can stay where you are, but I’m moving on.