Break-up Letter

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We need to talk. This relationship thing we have going on, it’s not really working for me. I want to break up.

It’s not me, it’s you.

You’re a control freak, you completely took over my life, you took from me the first year of being a Mum. You affected me like nothing ever has – that’s not a compliment by the way. You were always there niggling away at me; I need space.

You came into my life just after my little boy had been born, you made me scared to be a Mum and doubt my ability to do a good job. Because of you I blamed myself, you made me think I was failing. I couldn’t even leave the house without you tagging along. Even when I was out with my friends you were there, telling me to go home, holding me back.

Well stick this in your pipe and smoke it – you don’t get to do that anymore. I’m taking back the control.

You’ll always be there, I know that. Like a ghost, a memory of what used to be but I refuse to have you pulling my strings anymore. Everytime I can’t walk out of that door and the memory of your mind games rears its ugly head I’m going to imagine looking at you dead in the face and tell you I can. I will show you I can, I will show you how I can. I’ll let you be there in the background if it means that much to you but anything you say will just wash over me.

I’m strong now, I can fight you. I might have bad days with your words appearing in my mind but the next day you will be gone. I promise you that.

Anxiety, you can stay where you are, but I’m moving on.

Rach

Mummascribbles
Brilliant blog posts on HonestMum.com

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26 Comments

  1. 27/02/2015 / 10:37

    Oh hun, I love this. I feel like I want to high five you. You are fabulous, and so is this post! Anxiety is horrible and selfish and has robbed me of so many things. I’m so sorry u have also had it invade your life too. But good on u for putting it in it’s place! Xxxxx

    • Mummy in Training
      Author
      27/02/2015 / 11:05

      *high five* Thank you so much for such a lovely comment. I’m not having the best of days with it so seemed a good time to tell it to shove off!!!! xxxx

  2. 27/02/2015 / 13:05

    Such a good break up letter! Anxiety is such a horrid horrid feeling and we ALL get it. Just remember that 🙂

    • Mummy in Training
      Author
      27/02/2015 / 17:45

      Aw thank you so much. Glad you liked it 😉 xx

  3. 27/02/2015 / 13:53

    You go girl…..!
    Thank you for sharing this with us it was a moving post, I don’t think I would of been as brave in your situation, so well done you. xx

    • Mummy in Training
      Author
      27/02/2015 / 17:46

      Thank you. It’s amazing how brave you can be if you need to be I guess. Thank you for commenting. xx

  4. 27/02/2015 / 13:55

    Love this, so important not to let that niggling voice we all have and anxiety beat us. Thanks for linking up to #brilliantblogposts xx

    • Mummy in Training
      Author
      27/02/2015 / 17:47

      Thats very true!! Thank you for commenting. xx

    • Mummy in Training
      Author
      28/02/2015 / 09:41

      Thank you! xx

    • Mummy in Training
      Author
      28/02/2015 / 20:05

      Thanks hun, definitely getting there 🙂 xx

  5. 28/02/2015 / 19:59

    Good for you! Anxiety sneaks in at the worst times doesn’t it! But taking charge, knowing what you want, that you don’t want to lose any more bits…Priceless!!! Standing behind you cheering you on!

    • Mummy in Training
      Author
      28/02/2015 / 20:05

      Aw thank you so much. I’m in a very determined mood!

    • Mummy in Training
      Author
      14/07/2015 / 10:02

      Thank you so much. It is on its way to becoming more manageable! x

  6. 14/07/2015 / 10:06

    Go you!!! This is such a great, kick ass post, I hope you will read it back on days you don’t feel so strong. Good luck with the break up! #TwinklyTuesday
    Morna recently posted…Disneyland on a shoestringMy Profile

    • Mummy in Training
      Author
      19/07/2015 / 21:30

      Thanks lovely! It is a great one to look back on when I am feeling a bit wobbly xx

    • Mummy in Training
      Author
      19/07/2015 / 21:29

      Hehe thank you. Hope it didn’t disappoint 😉 xx

  7. 14/07/2015 / 13:11

    What a great break up letter! I personally know the controlling nature of anxiety and this is a great way to keep moving forward, even when it seems impossible.

    Stopping over from #TwinklyTuesday… so glad I did!

    Marissa

    • Mummy in Training
      Author
      19/07/2015 / 21:29

      Thank you 🙂 Hope you are ok xx

    • Mummy in Training
      Author
      19/07/2015 / 21:28

      Aw hope it goes away soon, it’s such a tough one to get rid of xxx

    • Mummy in Training
      Author
      19/07/2015 / 21:28

      Thanks my lovely. Glad to see the back of it! xx

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